Title: 'TON AMOUR, EST MEILLIEUR QUE LA GLACE...' (Your love, is better than ice-cream) Author: xxx//maddy Fiction: Rated T (PG13) - MSR/....(kinda)RST, but more UST! - 5000 words. Disclaimer: The characters used in this fic are not mine, they were created by Chris Carter and are property of C20th Fox. I am not profiting from anything I write - I do it cos I feel like it! Summery: Set post-Tithonus - in the hospital, the journey home and the evening in - I played on a vulnerable and emotional Scully - all she wants is some comfort and protection, and all Mulder wants to do is offer her that. Reviews: Feedback would be great - This is only my second fic ever - and I wrote this for Camy hence the French in the title), so I have to say thankyou to her once more for motivating me to write this, I wouldn't have done it otherwise. I hope you enjoy it. ******************************************************** She sat there, propped up by 3 plump, solid pillows - as much as she tried to stare out of the window, she couldn't avert her eyes from the 'exchange' that was taking place outside her room in the corridor. Mulder was obviously making Ritter feel worse than he already did about what happened in that house, and Scully felt glad of it. She felt she was Mulder's property, and she liked it - liked the feeling she got from knowing he was there for her now, that he would kill anyone who intentionally hurt her; it felt like a million rose petals blossoming inside her, warming her from her toes right through to her fingertips...she knew she loved him ....and he loved her. Mulder leaned back against the glass door to her room, and tumbled in looking as cool as ever - Ritter was well informed that he was, in fact, one lucky son-of- a-bitch... He turned to face her, and a smile spread across his lips - to know she was going to be ok was all he wanted at this point, to have her back, in front of him, under his control - he felt so much more confident now. As he looked at her pale complexion, he knew she was still in pain, and it crushed him - to know she was physically hurting because of someone else just tore him up. He never trusted this other guy with Scully's well being from the beginning. He reached out slowly for her hand, and she lifted her tiny limb up towards him - his touch was warm, and it sent a bolt of lightning through her, she felt so safe now - he truly was the /only/ one she trusted, and she never wanted to be without him. He brushed his thumb across hers as she playfully responded to his touch, a friendly clasp of hands to say 'I'm so glad you're here'. She glanced at their hands together, and saw how they..../fit/ - perfectly, they just looked...../right/ in oneanother..... God, stop it! Stop imagining what it would feel like to have him gently reach for your face, cradling it between his palms as he scatters a perfect kiss on top of your lips, illuminating every cell as he presses closer and closer towards your mouth, lacing you with that sweet perfection he posesses.....before reversing the movement as he backs away again to reveal a pinkish flush spreading across your cheeks as he releases them, sliding his soft, strong hands slowly away again.....just.....stop it.... She couldn't stop imagining these things any more - she thought about him all the time, every time he called her while she was out on the case, he made her smile, gave her butterflies inside and she felt exclusive to be on the other end of the line to Fox Mulder - sometimes her little fingernail would slide into the corner of her mouth and she couldn't help biting down on it, in an effort to kerb her girlish excitement towards her partner from showing in her voice. 'How can you have too much life..?' Scully honestly wanted to know the answer to this question; she could live every day with Mulder over and over again, and never get tired. They always had something to talk about, something to work on, something in common - SOMETHING that kept them fixed to one another, unable to let go of each other for longer than a couple of days at a time. 'I think death only looks for you....when you seek its opposite' That's true - Scully wanted nothing more than to live - she was loving her life at the moment, aside from the fact they were off the x-files. Kirsch would do anything to close Mulder down, and she resented being offered this case whilst seperated from him - it just didn't feel right. As much as she wanted to prove to everyone that she was capable of solving this case without Mulder by her side, secretly she loved Mulder's cheeky and sweet after hours phonecalls with all the extra info he could get to help her out.... Mulder asked for nothing in return....only that Scully did well and redeemed herself for the shit he'd put her through because of his hasty lines of investigation and all the incriminating evidence they had recently uncovered. But Scully loved the thrill she got from living her day to day life alongside Mulder, he was more than just a best friend to her, he was her companion, and she had become accustomed to his presence and his ways. They stared at each other for a while, taking in all they'd missed out on since she'd been sent to New York. Mulder, still smiling deeply into her, continued melting her fingers to liquid as he brushed his thumb so gently along them. He felt so gentle, yet so strong to Scully - his hand completely enveloped hers and she wanted so badly to feel her whole body against his, just the same - the feeling of them curled up together, somewhere safe and sweet smelling, dimly lit with just enough background noise to drown out the silence. His apartment, or her apartment....she closed her eyes and wanted to be there, cocooned in his embrace as they just lay there, talking about everything there was to talk about. She desperately needed that comfort, more now than ever before, all she wanted was an ever-lasting hug from her closest friend. Little did she know that by closing her eyes for just that split second, coupled with the strength of the morphene she was still taking, she had sent herself to sleep, and when she woke up again, she was in that same hospital room... alone. She was surrounded by people, but she'd never felt so lonely - to fall asleep with Mulder holding her hand and protecting her, and to wake up without him there was such a deflation. God, she wanted to go home. ********************************************************** 'You ready to go?!' Mulder burst through the door to Scully's brightly lit room just as she was zipping up her bag of things he'd brought down from DC with him. She turned, shuffling her feet to one side; it still hurt her to twist round too far. His face was illuminated, and made the harsh light in the room seem even more blinding to Scully. 'Yep!' - She returned the same, broad smile, only much more forced than his, as she thought of nothing but arriving home and getting between the sheets of her *own* bed, sleeping until she woke up, not until she was woken!! Mulder took a long stride over towards her and picked up her bag before briefly rubbing his palm down the top of her arm - he felt warm to her through the soft, fluffy grey material of her top; under his hand he felt that softeness he'd missed so much, more than he thought he ever would or could. His touch was quick, but it was exactly the reassurance she needed - she was finally on her way out of this place, and with Mulder by her side she was confident that nothing else like the Hell she'd just endured was going to happen to her for a long, long time....if ever. 'Bet you can't wait to get back home, Scully? I know I can't...' He placed his palm between her shoulder blades and guided her through the open door, as if she were some fragile china doll that might break at the slightest touch of anyone but his trained self. He never usually felt this compelled to touch Scully....in fact, he never usually noticed he was touching her at all - but this time, after seriously considering how close he came to losing her, he responded to every movement her small frame made as she walked just a few inches ahead of him. The journey to the airport was quiet - they both thought they'd have so much to say, but they found themselves stumped for words - the radio was playing quietly and lost reception every time the window wipers swept the raindrops from the windscreen of their rented sedan - the intermittent white noise became hypnotic and eventually Mulder forgot it was there. Scully however found that as soon as she noticed it, it became THE most annoying thing on the planet, and half way through one of her favourite R.E.M.tracks she slammed the on/off switch - hard! This caused a sweet smile to spread across Mulder's face, and he briefly took his eyes off the congested road ahead of him to glance at Scully who's eyes locked onto his and displayed her niggling frustration at still being in New York. She saw his smile and knew he'd caught on to her tiny annoyance - he made her smile back, recognizing her own cute reaction to the glitches in the music and Mulder in turn laughed sweetly as he focused his attention back on their route to the airport. 'So I'm thinking when we get back, I'll drop you off at your place, get you settled back in, and I can head to that new Chinese place for dinner - get us some take-out...?' 'Yeeeeeeessssss!!!' Scully's eyes widened as she sighed her approvement at Mulder's great idea - she hadn't been feeling all that hungry, but as soon as he suggested Chinese take-out, she wanted nothing else, and she felt even more eager to get home.....if that was at all possible!? Again Mulder laughed, and glanced in her direction. This time her wide eyes lay firmly fixed on the road ahead, as if she was willing the busy traffic to hurry along so she could get back to the comfort of her own sofa, wearing her own clothes, clean out of hercupboard, that smelled of fresh air and flowers.....that smelled of...home. Imagine the worst discomfort you've ever felt, that time when you want nothing more than to get out of whatever it is you're wearing, throw on some soft, loose, light clothing and clamber into bed - that time when all you feel is tense and eager to feel the cool, gentle pressure applied to your legs by freshly tucked bed linen.....all you want is your bed and the soft lighting of your humble home. Imagine feeling the dullest heaviest pain in your abdomen, like that feeling you get when you've eaten too much at one time, or drank a fizzy soda way too fast. Imagine that cold and naked feeling you get when the constant touch of someone you love ceases, when all you need is to feel the strength of another human-being pressing around you gently, but with the potential to crush you with all their love and respect for you. Imagine all these things all at one time....and then multiply them by ten....and you're roughly feeling the exact same thing as Dana Scully is right now. 'I just want to go home, Mulder....' Her bottom lip softened and she felt hot tears well up along a silvery ledge...forming a perfect droplet in the corner of one eye before streaming rapidly down the side of her face furthest away from her partner. That single tear burned her cheek as it raced south, leaving a strong trail of glitter behind it, releasing a fraction of her pain and anguish while it slowed and faded as it reached her neck. Quickly her hand followed the line the tear had taken, brushing it away, smudging the moisture into her paler-than-usual porcelain skin. She hoped Mulder hadn't seen this display of weakness, but at the same time she craved his comforting tone of voice telling her- 'It won't be long now, Dana...' Dana...?! He /never/ called her that unless he felt the need - she could recall every time he used her first name, but she also knew that this was a time when he was indeed likely to do so....at a time he felt he needed to sympathise with her, when he took that soft, comforting tone of voice she was truly so desperately craving. 'Yeah....I just....' 'I know.' He glanced at her again, this time with a look of empathy, like he too was feeling her pain and would give anything to take it away, to make her smile again. And how he loved to see her smile.....she *would* smile tonight, no matter what, he was dedicating his entire being to seeing the one beautiful smile that he loved so much. ******************************************************* Scully had slept terribly on-and-off throughout most of the flight, while Mulder sat reading through an old book he'd picked up in a dusty smelling book exchange in the city. Occasionally he paid attention, but he was more bothered about Scully, staring for minutes at a time, just following the slow rising and falling of her chest to make sure she was ok. As sure as he was that she was actually fine, he still couldn't shake off the sickening fear of losing her, not now, not this far down the line....not when they were /this/ close.....to so many things.... ****************************************************** Back at Scully's apartment, Mulder pushed open the white door to her airy living room: he held the door for her as she drifted past his out-stretched arms. You'd have thought that the air in a room which had been closed for over two weeks would have been all stale and heavy....but it wasn't at all - it smelled sweet of hydrangea; the pot pourris she'd leftout in a glass bowl made the room seem light and fresh, open and welcoming. She breathed in a lungfull of the coolair and sighed heavily with her eyes closed: no-one could possibly imagine how good it felt to be back. Mulder closed the door and walked quickly past her, he took the bag through to her bedroom, placing it on top of her chest ofdrawers so she needn't move it before climbing into bed that night. Meanwhile, Scully dropped her keys down on her desk - each shiny, cool, metal shape falling past her limp and delicate fingers, before crashing in a harmonic tone onto the polished wood surface. She clicked on her desk lamp to illuminate the large room, lit only by the low sun, setting on the other side of her slightly tilted venitian blinds.The rays of sunshine were still visible after the artificial light softened the appearace of the cream walls, as she followed Mulder into her bedroom. Mulder was just closing one of the wooden drawers after pulling out a pair of plain white cotton pyjamas that had been folded neatly in their place. She realised how nice it felt to have someone who already knew where everything was in her home, she didn't need to exhaust herself telling him where he could find a blanket or some spare towels, or even whereshe kept the tiniest of things like the chocolate sprinkles for on top of the coffee, or the corkscrew that worked better than all the others she'd accumulated over the years. It was so easy to have him around, like he was a second part to her, and the room felt cold and empty when he wasn't there. But tonight he *was* here, and he was going to stay and make sure she was ok. He lay the light material of the pyjamas in front of her where she stood propped against her bed, and turned to leave. 'Thankyou.' She paused, 'Mulder, thankyou.' Her eyes were focused on the white cotton and her fingers toyed around a loose piece of thread - she glanced upwards to him, and he glanced back. He shrugged and smiled, shaking his head ever so slightly as a signal that what he was doing for her was only natural behaviour of a best friend when he was needed the most. 'It's no problem...'And he clicked the door shut with such gentleness she couldn't help but melt as a glimpse of a smile graced her lips. As soon as she'd showered and changed, she headed into the lounge where she found Mulder slumped on her couch holding the remote above him as he rested his arm on the back of the couch behind his head. He clicked back and forward through the channels, but nothing much captured his interest, and he settled for the local news and weather update - he hadn't noticed Scully stood behind himm. 'Nothing much on, huh..?' He tipped his head right back and saw her slightly more rosy face looking down at him, framed by a cascade of firey hair that draped down either side of her cheeks. She tucked a section behind her ear and her hand remained there to stop it from tumbling back down. She looked so beautiful, even upside down she looked amazing, and he was in awe of her. 'Nope', he averted his eyes back to the screen and she moved around the sofa to sit next to him. He must have gone back to her room whilst she was taking a shower, as he was sat with a blanket folded in his lap. He wore a plain black tee and jeans, slightly faded and scuffed around the bottoms where they'd dragged on the floor over time. They were his favourite jeans, and they were her favourites too - he looked....'at home' in them, and she liked that. As shedropped to the couch, a sweep of air drifted towards Mulder: she smelled of sugary sweet vanilla and mild flowers, he imagined her skin all warm, smooth and creamy and he felt the urge to just snuggle her up close to him, but she did that herself.... As her head rested heavily on his chest, she tucked her feet up and reached for the blanket out of his lap - he brought his arm down from behind his head and positioned the huge folds of the blue blanket around her, resting his arm on her waist, moving his fingers every now and again as a method to make sure she knew he was still awake. They sat like that for almost an hour, watching various bits of tv and occasionally chatting about the visual stimuli. It was purely phatic, but neither of them cared; all that mattered was they were together and safe, and having a relaxing and pleasant evening in. 'You still want me to go for that take-out, Scully...?' He moved his whole body as he leaned to look at her face. 'Mmmmm....' Her brow furrowed and she turned up her lips in disapprovement... 'I dunno, Mulder...I actually don't feel that hungry at all....sorry.' 'That's cool, I can just make something small here, but you're gonna have to eat something - you've had nothing all day.' He was right, she hadn't eaten all day, and as much as she thought she was hungry for Chinese food when she was sat in the car in New York, she found herself repulsed by the thought of anything other than- 'Ice cream...I want ice cream...' She lifted her head up and sat straight on the couch. Mulder looked at her and laughed... 'Ice cream?!' 'Yeah, oh my God I just want to sit here with a tub of ice cream.' Still beaming at her, Mulder stood up and smoothed out his jeans. Scully looked up at him with puppy-dog eyes, and of course, he wasn't going to deny this woman her one desire.... 'Do you even have any in?' He headed over to the kitchen and she kneeled up on the couch, arms draped over the back of it as she faced him. 'No, but the video store a couple of blocks down sell my *favourite* cherry garcia.....' She raised her eyebrows, 'seeing as you were heading out for Chinese food anyway....' He picked up his keys and clasped at the golden door handle, twisting it briskly. 'I will be back in ten minutes.' ************************************************************* While he was gone, Scully stayed where she was, enjoying every second of the nurse maid treatment she was receiving - this was exactly what she needed and she felt a million times better for having Mulder stay for the evening. As much as she needed to rest, she wanted the company - she was tired of sleeping all the time and sitting in a room on her own- being with Mulder was the best remedy she'd ever encountered. Even when she did sleep, she couldn't shake thenightmares she was having - reliving her ordeal over and over again, feeling that inexplicable pain as she dropped to the ground, slumped against the wall, the face of death flitting around her, seeking her gaze as a pathway to taking her soul. Her thought was disturbed by the latch on the door. Mulder let himself in again rather than make her get up from the couch - he usually knocked unless it was an emergency and he knew she wasn't there - they exchanged keys a while back, it just seemed like the thing to do. 'One cherry garcia for the lady' He produced a perfectly sized tub of heaven from the paper bag and handed it over to a slightly giddy Scully who was obviously craving this girlish indulgence. He tossed a spoon from the kitchen drawer as she snapped open the lid, shattering the quietness surrounding her. 'Mmmmmmmm,' she growled at the sight of the red swirls decorating the untouched white ice cream, laced with soft, dark cherries. It was like undisturbed snow on Christmas morning, and she suddenly felt childish again; she wanted to be the first to destroy the smooth white layer of glittery heaven. 'Thanks.' She dragged the tip of the spoon over the surface of the ice cream, melting it into a small curl before levering it into her watering mouth. And there it was....that which Mulder had wanted to see all day, she looked right at him as he watched her, and she smiled so brightly that her whole face glowed. He couldn't stop himself any longer. That was it. He dropped the brown paper bag down on the kitchen counter, along with his keys, and he rushed over to where Scully was curled up, swirled in the celular blanket like the cherries in her ice cream. He perched on the cushion right next to her, his heart racing for the love he felt so strongly for this amazing woman. And she *was* amazing - she was everything he could ever want: funny, intelligent, bright, honest, strong....and unbelievably beautiful. With a mouthfull of ice cream she met his gaze, and she was shocked my the intensity in his eyes - there was passion in there like she had never seen before, and she found her whole body aching for him to reach out and touch her. He was so closeto her that he could smell her silky hair: pineapples, passion fruit and a smudge of coconut blended in with the sweet allmond and berries drifting off her breath. For what seemed like forever they stared at one another, unable to move, frozen, locked into one another's eyes.... Scully shattered the spell as she dropped the tub and spoon to the floor beside her, and Mulder reached out for her face with both hands sliding his fingers through her hair - he was gentle, but pulled her closer to him with enough force to make her catch her breath. This is exactly how she thought it would happen. She finally realised that this was what she *really* wanted. He pressed his lips against hers, and they both sighed heavily, releasing six years of tension all in one breath. Her lips were cold in places, but deliciously sugary - he felt her fingertips stroke the skin across the back of his neck - they were icy cold and as her nails gently scratched him he felt apulse pass right down his spine. She responed to his shiver by pulling him firmly towards her - it was passionate, but sweet and gentle at the same time. If one kiss had every emotion that two people could feel for one another, this kiss had them all. Love, hunger, yearning, respect,awe - it was a shock to both of them. Without pushing too far, they moved away from each other, painfully slowly they parted their lips, one cell at a time - their mouths fell open, breathing into onne another, eyes closed, brows tense, unable to mentally or physically process what had just happened to them. 'I thought you were going to die, Scully...' Mulder whispered, moving his fingers in small circles on her scalp as he pressed his forhead against hers. '*I* thought I was going to die too...' Her hands slid down his neck, around his shoulders, traced his collar bone and rested at his chest, pawing gently at him though his smooth black t-shirt. They stayed like that, close, for just a few seconds while they slowed their heartbeat, got used to how close they were to the other. Finally, the corners of Scully's lips turned upwards, and she dropped her head to face her lap as she laughed breathily. Mulder opened his eyes to see Scully shaking her head and laughing like a schoolgirl who'd just got her first date. He couldn't help but feel that same childish laughter well up inside himself either, and he let out a throaty giggle. They looked at one another again, and paused before breaking down in the sweetest laughter each other had ever heard. ********************************************************** By 11pm, Scully was falling asleep in front of the film they were watching - Mulder had chosen something from the video store when he went to get the ice cream, he made sure it was something that Scully would like too....but she was exhausted. He looked at her as she slept - she looked so peaceful and innocent - you wouldn't be able to tell the things she'd been through in her life just by looking at her. Rather than waking her, Mulder moved from underneath her and reached down to carry her into her bed. Usually he'd have left her sleeping on the couch, but he knew that if she woke up in the night, she'd be uncomfortable there. And besides, he knew how much she wanted to be inher own bed after spending two weeks between hospital sheets. He positioned one arm across the top of her back and managed to drape her arm over his shoulder, her head dropped forward and into his neck as he lifted her with his other arm tucked underneath her knees. She was lighter than he remembered, maybe she'd lost weight since he had to carry her up that ladder in the ice and snow - he didn't know, just as long as she was nnever as painfully thin as when she was fighting her cancer - /that's/ when he was most bothered by her tiny size, he was watching her waste away, and it was killing him too. But that's all over now - he had her back, in his arms, in his sight, and he was never letting her go again. He never really trusted that kid, Ritter, and he'd never trust anyone else either. He kicked back the covers with his foot, and slid his partner gently underneath them. Just as he pulled the feathery quilt around her, she stirred and opened her eyes: 'Mulder?' 'Yeah, Scully - it's me, I'm still here.' She smiled ever so slightly and whispered, 'Good'. He stroked the length of her arm and made to leave the room. She lifted her head. 'Where are you going?' Her tone was abrupt and high. 'I'm gonna take off, I'll call in on you tomorrow though, I promise.' She shuffled and sat, propped up on her elbows - he could see the whites of her eyes glistening in the glimmer of light from the moon outside. There was a pause before she drew the courage to ask him: 'Don't go.' He was touched, but he was reluctant to take advantage - after what had happened earlier, he was unsure what the hell was going on between them, the last thing he wanted was to get the wrong idea....so he played it safe. 'Ok, I'll take the couch. Just call me if u want anything' and he took a couple more paces towards the door. 'No...' He was confused, and so was she. She didn't want to have sex with Mulder, she wasn't thinking like that, she just wanted that comfort, she wanted to fall asleep with him wrapped around her, and wake up exactly the same way. 'Scully, I-' 'Don't make me say it out loud, Mulder.....just...' He was still unsure... 'Scully I'm sorry.....I just don't wanna mess this up-' 'I know, I know, but....just....I-' He saw her eyes growing brighter, he could see tears forming, ever so slowly. He strode over to where she was sitting, and she out stretched her arms to him. He pulled her into a warm hug, and she loved the strength he possessed when he held her like that. She whispered into his ear 'Just lie with me, please.' 'Ok' Mulder let go of her and wandered round to the other side of her bed. He climbed on top of the covers and shuffled across to where she lay curled. He moved close to her back, and rested his arm across her body. Every fibre of her being relaxed, and she merged into him, bringing her arms around his and resting her chin against his skin. It wasn't long before she drifed off to sleep, and every time she woke up with a start through the night, she felt Mulder's embrace tigten ever so slightly around her - just the reassurance she needed, she'd never felt so safe, and she wondered if she could ever sleep another night without him by her side.... ............!! Did she *really* just think that...? What had happened..? What had she done...? It didn't matter, not now - she could worry about that another time. **************************************************************** For Camy - I love ya, girl, and this is just for you - I hope you like it... Again, I tried to do the best I could without losing sight of the characters.I initially wanted this to be UST, but couldn't help putting a bit of a kiss in there; I tried it without any physical contact, but it was seriously lacking something. Hope it's not too soppy and whiny on Scully's part either - I just wantedto make the most of her feelling vulnerable, I could see that in her face when she wa sat in the hospital end at the end of the ep. Anyway...please feedback if you enjoyed it - I need a bit of a push - if you like them, I will write more, and if not, I shall quit before I embarrass myself too much!! If you haven't read my other fic, it's called TEQUILA - check it out, it's similar in parts but different too!! Thanks for reading...